By the way, I know a few of you are curious about my numbers and would perhaps like to see a few pictures. All will be published when I reach my goal, which hopefully, will be before Christmas. A gift from the Christmas gods, I believe.
- The Food Part Was Better Than I Imagined. Ok, well, the first few weeks of protein and berries were tough, but once real foods, like vegetables and dairy and fruits and grains were integrated back into my diet, managing to eat well and deliciously was much easier than I had ever imagined. I didn't feel like I was sacrificing, rather, I was making better choices.
- The Mental Part was Harder Than I Ever Imagined. It turns out that integrating the mental - through group and individual therapy - into 20/20 is a brilliant idea. While figuring out why I gained weight and my food/alcohol triggers, the coping mechanisms and having the mental support from a group going through the exact same thing as you, is all good, remaking yourself physically also brings up a number of emotions and feelings, some good, some bad, all needing to be processed and understood. I now understand why Jillian asks those tough questions when she's beating the shit out of the Biggest Losers - the mental has been the most important part. Which brings me to...
- The Support Network. My friends rock. Despite the fact that Pete consistently tried to tempt me along the way, everyone has been a huge rock of support. Compliments, always letting me have a sip, not making fun of my food, asking questions and listening to me talk about changes and frustrations and happiness and always, always providing encouragement. Beyond my core group, colleagues at the Big M, a few of whom have done 20/20, almost all of whom know someone who has done the program, have been fabulously supportive. Plus, the support from the 20/20 people, particularly my dietician and my trainer, has been amazing. No one judges.
- Sacrifices. I'm not going to lie - I have sacrificed a lot while doing 20/20. I've said no to social events, especially those involving food, just because it would have been too awkward. And when everyone around you is drinking and you're not, well, sometimes it's just sad and weird (although, watching others get drunk around me has its benefits). Has it been worth it? The jury is still fully out, but considering that I'm now running faster and stronger, and feeling so much healthier, and oh by the way, wearing sizes I never thought possible, well, you know which camp I'm leaning towards.
- Too Much Exercise = No Loss. Yeah, totally crazy, but for some people, over exercising inhibits weight loss. I was doing great until I started training for the half marathon, and then the weight loss window practically slammed shut. On the other hand, I lost an almost insanely high number of inches during that same period, so obviously, something was happening. Best compliment ever: my trainer told me that I wasn't sweating enough and had become an athlete. Second best compliment: A friend squeezed my thigh, and said "wow. You are all muscle. Wow."
- Peanut Butter is Delicious. My diet requires a daily tablespoon of peanut butter, which could be considered the best part of my day. It's been a long, long time since I've enjoyed peanut butter (I think I overdosed on PB&J in college), and I have to say, peanut butter is wonderful. It feels decadent, triggering my sweet and salty taste buds, tasting fatty and creamy against my tongue. It's a secret indulgence.
- Weight Loss is Expensive. I've dropped several sizes, which means that I am buying a brand new wardrobe. I tried my best not to buy too many "in between clothes", but at a certain point, I needed stuff that fit. For some reason, I naively thought that I could continue wearing all of my old clothes and then buy new ones at the end, proving that I'm not always the brightest. I've now bought the exact same pair of Gap jeans in three different sizes. Not that I'm complaining or anything, because really, it's shopping, but wow, it's expensive. If you're looking to buy me a gift, I think you know what would make me really happy.
- Shopping is Now Fun. I've never been a big fan of shopping, mainly because as a size 16, well, my choices were a bit limited. Now, I kind of enjoy shopping. Everything fits, I'm exploring new styles and wearing clothing that I would never have worn six months ago, an unexpected and very pleasant result.
- I Miss the Insulation, and the Twins. I've been making fun of friends who wear scarves inside for years, once saying, "I'm slightly suspicious of people who wear scarves indoors". Now I get it. Before, I didn't need to wear a scarf inside, because, well, I had a layer of natural insulation. Now, that layer is gone...and as winter has set in in Seattle, I've gotten really cold. And the twins...Carrie summed it up best for me a few weeks ago when she said, "Schelley, I love the way you look. But these," waving her hands in the direction of my chest, "I miss these!" So sad. And then she forced me to try on a sexy black dress. Hmmm...
- Croissants & Cupcakes: Periodically, I'll crave random foods, something that usually goes away after a few days. But there have been two consistent cravings: croissants and cupcakes. I think the croissant is somewhat out of habit - every few weeks, I'd treat myself to a croissant at either Fuel or Vivace with my morning coffee. A high quality croissant is really a delightful day to start the day. Now, I try not to gaze longingly at the croissant case, but it's hard not to think about the deliciousness of this French pastry. I'm more puzzled by the cupcake cravings. While longtime readers of this blog know that I am enamored with cupcakes, it's not like I ate a cupcake a day, or even weekly or monthly. But still, I think about cupcakes. Oh snap.
- Alcohol is Essential. I've already written about this, but let me once again repeat - I really miss wine. I am looking forward to bringing it back to my life, in a much more measured way, of course.
- I Didn't Know a Lot About Nutrition. I thought that I was a healthy eater and did a solid job of cooking healthy, and compared to a lot of other people, that's a true statement. And then I joined 20/20...and learned enough to know that I knew far less than I thought. Nutrition is complicated - I meal track, not just looking at calories, but trying to consume the correct ratios of protein, carbs and (healthy) fats. It's a moving target, depending on my exercise for the day or plans for the next day. And completely fascinating.
- Most of Us Are Not as Healthy as We Think. Enough said.
